Your doorbell is broken.

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What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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Canada's army

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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