What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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roses are red, violets are blue, get in that bed or I stick your head down the loo! Christian grey

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Your mum is dead

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

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What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I cried when I cut up the onion.

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Josh kissing a girl

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jewish people like other jewish people.

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

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Men's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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