Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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josh simpson has cancer

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops