roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

Penis

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

Dead babies.

minorities

i am predestal

What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

A jew and a black man walk into a bar the black man orders a screwdriver. The jrw asks him why did you order a screw driver.? The black man answer black:I enjoy screw drivers.

Black people

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

a man walks into a bar.......ouch

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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