What's brown and sticky? A stick

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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American Idol

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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steves legs

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

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Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

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Hey what time is it. 3:15

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Dan O'Driscoll

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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