When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Where else? The junk yard

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

A man buys free health care...

Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

Got milk? No.

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

There is a car full of black people.

What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

nice shorts.

What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

Niko isnt a mexican douche

whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...