Hey what time is it. 3:15

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

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Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

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Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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If i was a chicken i would probably not be on this site. But i am, so you can all suck it!!!! BAHHHH i'm a frog EJ

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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