If you dislike this you are a homosexual (watch how many dislike this)

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Religion

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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guess what?

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What do you call an Asian pilot? A pilot...

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Q. Why did uncle Al die of smoking? A. His socks were to big -Noah Weisskopf

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

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The government makes a good decision

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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