What did the guy say to the mushroom?

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin Goblin.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

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What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

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9/11/01 walks into a bar

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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Q.Why was 6 crying? A.Because 7,8,9

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safety framed toilets like bbw (big black women)

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Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

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Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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