What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

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How Many Friends Did The Ginger Kid Have? None.

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Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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marble

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Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

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YO mama so stupid, when she got hit by a bus she said WHO THREW THAF ROCK AT ME.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Niko isnt a mexican douche

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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The geese of Growmore

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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