What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Aodhan Hearty

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Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

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9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

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Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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Oliver's friends

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DERP

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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