Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

Justin beiber comment if u get it

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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