How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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How do you cure AIDS? You can't.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

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knock knock go away

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What Is somthing that is 5 "5" and white A 5 "5" white person

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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nine...eleven

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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gays

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Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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