what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

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Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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^that joke's not funny

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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fart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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