- Anti Joke

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

why do asian people eat each other? because they are cannibles

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

I won the game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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