a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

AROUND

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

does this look unsure to you?

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

The Aristocrats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...