a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

Is Carly smart? No.

Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

why did the man die? he got shot

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

A man buys free health care...

Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

A black guy walks in to a bar.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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