How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Freedom of Speech

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

i have aids and a chode

Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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