What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

So one time this woman was learning...

balls in ya mouf

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

Hello world

That's unfortunate.

If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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