Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

What do apples taste like? Apples.

Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Is Carly smart? No.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy There's the kitchen Sandwich maybe?

Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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