What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

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Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

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why did the man die? he got shot

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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if u r not my friend, like this joke

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? ...

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A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

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A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

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Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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I hate you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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