If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Kerry Katona becomes independent.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

bite me

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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