Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops