How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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