Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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