What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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