Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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