A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did John name his dog? Doggy

thumb_up thumb_down +22

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops