What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

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So these two girls have a cup .

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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