Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

thumb_up thumb_down +2

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

thumb_up thumb_down +2

One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops