A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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school homewrok

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

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What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops