Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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