Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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