why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops