Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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Weaner

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops