A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Neither did she.

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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