What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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boner

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

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What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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