What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

If you have a stroke, call 000

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

What's the difference between a red ball and a blue ball? There both blue but the red one

Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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