Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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womens rights

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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