Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops