Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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one day a white guy was in detroit. it was very strange. nothing happened

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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