Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops