Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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