what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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school homewrok

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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