Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

dallen loves penis

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

If you just read this, You're dead.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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