Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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