What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

make me a sandwich! what kind?

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

What's the difference between a lamp?

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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