Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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There was a fat man crying. I just told him the local Mc D's was arson attacked.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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