What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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A blind man walks into a library.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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