I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Golf.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops