Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Why did the blond fall down? She died.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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