What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing you mum having ***

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

What's up with airplane food? Not sure, but last flight I was on they didn't serve any food. It could have been because it was too short of a flight or perhaps the recessed economy caused jetliners to cut costs. Either way, I didn't get a bag of peanuts.

A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

Why did the chicken cross the road? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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