dat shoe shine tho

What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

What do you call a bear. Rob.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Indians

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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