What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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