How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

A boy with red hair is happy.

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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