What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

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Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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Rick Perry.

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

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What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

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blubber vaginass CC

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Laura Pratz..

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One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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